Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
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