Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
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