A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
Randomize
