Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
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