windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
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