**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
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