cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
Randomize
