I had a fork in my beer hand and just stabbed my tongue.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
23 Parents Gave Awful Advice about “The Birds and the Bees”
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
These 19 Deaths Are Ironically Hilarious
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you