I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize
