I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize
