I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Randomize
