I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
do you know what's more awkward than a positive pregnancy in a public bathroom?
not a thing
walking in on a stranger's positive pregnancy test in a public bathroom
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
I'm always down for nudity.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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