Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
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