her voice is like 435,765 daggers being simultaneously twisted into my eardrum
i'd rather just be hit by a car than answer her phone calls
shit! I think I may have lost something in your car. Look for anything that can possibly belong to me, especially look out for a pair of pink panties in a ziplock. I lost my spare and you better find it before someone else does.
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
Randomize