we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
I'm at a work party and I don't know how to drink socially. You know, like slow?
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
I yelled at your uterus for you.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
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