just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
On my way home I saw a car that had "MOVE OVER PLZ" emblazoned across the windshield backwards, so people could see it in their rearview mirror
If I ever drive for Lyft or Uber I'm definitely gonna do that
Randomize