I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
Randomize
