Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
MIDGETS
????
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Randomize
