Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
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