I'm really into asian looking animals
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
My bed is full of blood and feathers
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize