I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Randomize
