So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
okay pat passed out under dana's car
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Randomize
