Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
Randomize
