Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
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We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
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michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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