I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
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