omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
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