i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
Randomize