dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
Randomize
