I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.