Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
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