I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
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