She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
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