A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
I fill condoms, not promises.
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
Randomize