all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Randomize