Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
the new term for farting is butt boxing.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
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