Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
Randomize
