All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
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