your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Randomize
