i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
