It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
Can I crash on your couch? I just came home to find my wife giving two guys blowjobs.
Two?
Two.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
Randomize