she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
Randomize
