My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
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