I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
Randomize
