Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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