dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
I think people are normalizing furries
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
Randomize
