i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
This couple is walking their pig around campus
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