The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
Randomize