Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
Randomize
