Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
Randomize
