Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
All of my Tinder matches have neck tattoos. It's like God wants me to go to jail again.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
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