Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
Randomize
